Below are the 16 most recent journal entries recorded in Naughty Californian Hellcat's LiveJournal:

Friday, March 4th, 2005
6:07 pm	hahaha, this is ur fault jessie im only writing coz jessie is making me do this, grrr :( lolz, but nah i want to but i always 4get, i dont know y, dont ask. ne way, an update: i am now totally over my gf. i am dumping her coz we havnt tlkd in like....ages!!! its sux that i hav to do this but wen this sort of thing happens u just cant put up with having sum1 that doesnt tlk....AT ALL!!! dw, its ok, im not going to be sad coz im already over her. but after that i dont know wat ill do. maybe i could enjoy bachelor-ism for a little while before going lookin for sum1 again. bachelor-ism is fun, trust me! uve got no1 to look good for (not that i dont look good enuf already!) but i also get all of my money for myself. i dont need to by things for girls all the time. its way better. then again u hav no1 to care for and no1 cares for u. thats the downside. oh well ill ponder wat im gonna do later and update this again after ive done sumthing interesting :D tlk to u all later, k bye bye now! Current Mood: i dunno y, i should be sik... Current Music: alien ant farm - stranded!!! good song! download it pplz! (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, February 11th, 2005
7:01 pm	holy mother of fukken god! its been....1....2...3 and a bit months since i last put sumfin hear. the last entry was about jessie, so that was a long time ago! i havnt found time to tlk on this, or maybe i just didnt for a while and completely forgot!? hu knows! but i havnt been on msn alot either. maybe its a phase, i dunno, but its pretty fukn wierd. ill give u all an update if u dont think u know me very well ne more (thats probly most of u coz i havnt tlk to most ppl in ages! im such a fukhed!) well, my life is running pretty smoothly atm, which is a postitive. a negative would be that i hav gone bak to skewl and now i feel like murdering my maths teacher by buying 1 of those poisonous blowfishes and putting in her coffee!!!! grrr, shes such a fuk! i hope she dies!!! thats skewl life. home life is pretty good. mum has got me on this thing where she pays me 1 dollar an hour to study! booyah! free money, and all i hav to do is read some stupid science book thats telling me how im not gonna die rite this minute coz of little creature thingies that kill other creature thingies to keep me all good and healthy! so easy! but im still doing shit in science so its like getting the money for free, even if it is only a buck an hour :D thats home life. now to luv life. im very happily with my gf Caitlin. im sure most of u know that even if i only come on msn only a bit. its all over my msn name! prob is, shes away rite now! on camp for a month! buts its already been 3 weeks so she comes bak next friday!!!! holy shit i cant wait!!! but we did miss valentines day :( but its all good. i sent her a valentines day card and it should get to her rite on valentines day! (i hope) but there is 1 reli annoying problem with valentines day! grrrrr, some chik in my science class likes me and is giving me one of those valentines day flower thingys on monday! how fukn embarrasing! its rite in the middle of form!!! fuk!!! besides, this mite sound mean and heartless, but i dont want it!!! i dont like her! she likes me.....this is all dereks fault by the way coz he gave her the money to do it! little bastard, but that kinda means he is giving me a valentines day flower.....but personally i would prefer it from him than her! (NO! im not gay and u all know it!) oh well, ill live, i hope... thats about it i gess. ill tlk alot more now that ive remember LJ. so, tlk to u guys later :D:D:D BYE BYE!!! :D Current Mood: wOaH!!! Current Music: alien ant farm - attitude (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 10th, 2004
9:32 am	im sik of dis shit!!!!! fukn hell look jessie, i reli dont wanna fite with u. i want to be ur frend. one minute we were good frends and the next minute we r fukn yelling at each other. i dont lyk this. i dont lyk fighting with ppl, especially girls. i hate it. i reli want to be ur frend. i hate not tlkn to u. it makes just seeing u awkward. it sux. i dont reli know wat to do except say sorry for evrything i hav done rong. im reli reli sorry. i truly am. im sorry for showing claire the convo. im sorry for getting angry at u. im sorry for.....well im sorry for anything that has evr made u sad. i mean it. i hate myself for it. plz forgive me! i hate not tlkn to u. i miss seeing u and laughing with u. i luvd being with u, but if that cant happen any mor i understand. i would rather us be frends than fighting with u. i still want to be ur frend. i still want to be there for u, just lyk im there for claire, imogen, salika and the rest of ma mates as well. plz forgiv me jessie im reli reli reli sorry! Current Mood: fukn hell, not again Current Music: none, only on for a sec to say wat i hav to say (Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 9th, 2004
6:31 pm	ha ha ha, "nobish" i think its spelt "knobish"!!! ha ha ha. ne way, im ova it fuk, im sik again, and i probly wont be at skewl 4 another 2 days!!! dis is bullshit!!! fukn hell. oh well, not lyk im missing out on ne thing. cept that i dont get to call david a homo and say that brendin is a fag and punch him again. oh well, im bored! i dont know wat i will do for the next few days. shitty shitty shitty......................oh well, life sux atm. i just dont know wats up but i feel miserable coz im sik and shit. oh well, im sik of updating this. shitty. maybe i will stop bye bye duffman signing out Current Mood: ok den... Current Music: none (Comment on this)
Sunday, November 7th, 2004
12:46 pm	ha ha ha, our little secret. i wonder wen sum1 will actually figure it out. ne way, yeah nik and i r tlkn again, but i dont reli know wat made me want to tlk to him again. i havnt "hated" him for a long time now, and im glad he actually had the guts to come and say that he was sorry and stuff. i thought that was pretty kewl, so i thought "wat the hell, maybe we can be mates again". its all good, cept now jessie thinks that i only did it coz i wantd to get bak at her for breaking up with me again. i can tell u now, that is definately not the reason. although, 1 of the reasons y i wouldnt truce with nik b4 was becoz i was with jessie, and if i was still with her i wouldnt hav done it coz i know that would hav hurt her. i gess it just made it easier to do it, but that wasnt even close to being 1 of the reasons y i did it. i still luv her, and i wouldnt mean to hurt any 1 that i luv. any way, im not as sad as i was on friday. but once again, i dont know wen to giv up. i dont know if thats a good or bad thing, but it does mean that i will keep luving jessie. that could be good and bad. oh well, i will just hav to wait and c. gtg pplz, bye for now (ha ha ha, our little secret claire ;) Current Mood: no probs at the moment Current Music: Blink 182 - Always. Wow, im obsessed with this song (Comment on this)
Saturday, November 6th, 2004
1:24 pm	omg *tears stream down face* I swear that I can go on forever again please let me know that my one bad day will end I will go down as your lover, your friend give me your lips and with one kiss we begin Are you afraid of being alone cause I am, I'm lost without you are you afraid of leaving tonight cause I am, I'm lost without you I'll leave my room open till sunrise for you I'll keep my eyes patiently focused on you where are you now I can hear footsteps, I'm dreaming and if you will, keep me from waking to believe this Are you afraid of being alone cause I am, I'm lost without you are you afraid of leaving tonight cause I am, I'm lost without you Are you afraid of being alone cause I am, I'm lost without you are you afraid of leaving tonight cause I am, I'm lost without you are you afraid of being alone cause I am, I'm lost without you are you afraid of leaving tonight cause I am, I'm lost without you I'm lost without you I'm lost without you I'm lost without you I'm lost without you I'm lost without you Its all true!!! im lost without u!!! no matter how many times u break my heart, i cant seem to stop loving u! i dont know y! u r all i can think about. i just want to hold u in my arms just 1 mor time. i want to kiss u for the first time. i want to be with u forever, but i know now that this isnt going to happen. as much as i want it to. i wish i knew y u ended it again, so i could redo wat i hav done rong. i dont know wat it is about u jessie, but sumthing about u makes me want to keep loving u over and over again. ur perfect, ur beautiful, but i dont think those r the reasons y i still luv u. i wish i did. i hav been listening to these 2 songs and both of them remind me of u. the first 1 is so sad it makes me wanna cry coz of how much i need and miss u. the next 1 is a reminder of us.....*tears start streaming down face* I've been here before a few times and I'm quite aware we're dying and your hands, they shake the goodbyes and I'll take you back if you have me So here I am, I'm trying so here I am, are you ready? come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you, always kiss you, taste you, all night, always And I'll miss your laugh, your smile I'll admit I'm wrong if you tell me I'm so sick of fights, I hate them let's start this again for real So here I am, I'm trying so here I am, are you ready? so here I am, I'm trying so here I am, are you ready? Come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you, always kiss you, taste you, all night, always come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you, always kiss you, taste you, all night, always I've been here before a few times and I'm quite aware we're dying Come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you, always kiss you, taste you, all night, always come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you, always kiss you, taste you, all night, always Always, always Current Mood: i want u bak!!! Current Music: none (Comment on this)
Friday, November 5th, 2004
5:29 pm	hmmmm.... well well well, look wat has come bak to bite me in da ass!!! she sed to me on monday "ill understand if u dont wanna be with me, coz i will probly hurt u again". of course i sed "no, i reli wanna be with u too". woah! big mistake. i kinda wlkd into that 1 didnt i. now i know tho. after the first time, there shouldnt be a second. that is wat it was lyk with my mum and my dad. she sed she wantd to leave him so she did, but dad still luvd her and he askd if he could hav a second chance. mum said yeah, but dad lied to her again and that was the last straw. it ended finally. kinda sounds familiar, cept for the lying bit. 2nd time i hav been screwed around with. nadia lied to me, and jessie thought that it would be better if she got claire to tell me that she just wantd to be frends. WRONG WAY TO GO!!! im still yet to find out the full reason of y she wantd to leave me. its strange coz in her LJ post on thursday she said "luv u jordan, come bak to skewl NOW". wow, its strange how things change so quickly lyk that dont u think? i think i missing a piece to this puzzle, and its the piece that makes the picture beautiful (or in my case "makes the puzzle make sense!!!") im only blaming myself for 1 thing, BEING THE STUPID FUK TO THINK I HAD FOUND THE GIRL OR MY DREAMS AND THAT SHE WAS THE 1 FOR ME! i gess its bak to searching for her goodbye pplz (thanx for ur support claire, imogen and salika. ur da best) Current Mood: 2nd time.... Current Music: Blink 182 - Asthenia. Gr8 song (Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 3rd, 2004
1:25 pm	im sooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli reli sorry jessie. i had to go home. i feel lyk shit. ive got a sore throat and my cough is reli reli bad. i wasnt doing u any good there any way coz i couldnt hug u coz i didnt want u to get this............thing that i hav that is fukn pissn me off. i hate myself. i felt so bad knowing that i couldnt hug u. i feel lyk a fukn dipshit and i want this to go away!!! i hope u dont get this, coz its the worst fukn thing ever! it hurts lyk hell to swallow food and shit, and this cough feels lyk shards of glass goin down ma throat. it also hurts ma stomach muscles wen i cough. if u get this i will hate myself for the rest of my life. i reli wanna hug u, but im puttin u at risk of gettin this shitty piece of shit. i didnt want to go home coz i wantd to c u again at lunch, but i wasnt doin any good standing there by myself. once again, for the.............................139th time, i am reli sorry i had to go. LUV U JESSIE!!! PS. at least now i can work on ma history assignment, and the only reason i came to skewl was becoz claire told me that u would be reli sad (i dunno if u would hav been but i still had to c u) Current Mood: I HATE MYSELF!!! Current Music: Blink 182 - Always. i think thats the 3rd time now... (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 2nd, 2004
7:14 pm	NEVER BEEN HAPPIER!!! I LUV U SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUKN MUCH JESSIE!!! oh how i missd hugging u. im so glad im with u again. hey, dont worry, u know i dont blame u for having to end us last week. u had a reli good reason i understood that u needed some time to work out things at home for urself. u gotta know i am here for u any time u need me. i think ive told u that enuf but u should know that i am someone that u can tlk to any time u want to. ive discovered a major flaw in my plan to sit further away from my group. becoz i hav pretty much become the owner, ruler and decision maker of the group they all seem to want to follow me. this is reli annoying coz wen ever i go to tlk to jessie either derek or matt bode follows me, and then they start tlkn to me wen im tryna tlk to jessie. grrrrr *DIE DIE DIE*. i wish they would just leave me alone. im just gonna put ma bag down on the other side of that door and not tlk to them much, and after a few years the will probly stop wanting to tlk to me.............hopefully.... :( oh well, i mite take the day off tomorrow coz im sik. i only came to skewl today becoz i wantd to c jessie. i just had to c her and hug her again (i missed that so much) anyway, if im not at skewl tomorrow ppls then ull know y. sorry jessie, i dont wanna do it but im takin advantage of the fact that ma mum isnt here and i can just say im sik and get away with it. theres a 50 50 chance ill b at skewl, but i dont wanna do ma fukn italian test!!! ok, goodbye ppl. LUV U JESSIE!!! MWAH!!! Current Mood: LUV U SO MUCH!!! MWAH! Current Music: Blink 182 - Down. they r ma new fav band!!! YAY!!! (Comment on this)
Monday, November 1st, 2004
6:20 pm	dw jessie... dw jessie, i am here for u. any time u wanna tlk just grab me from where ever i am and take me somewhere where we can tlk in private. if ur having problems at home, at skewl, or u just wanna tlk im always here and im never busy so i will always listen. u r my first priority at the moment. i dont wanna c u upset becoz of sumfin at home. i wish i was in at least 1 of ur classes so that we would actually be able to tlk to each other other than at lunch. i know wat im gonna do now, im gonna sit on the other side of the door, and sit on the ground. if u wanna tlk without having ma gay fukn frends around then just come and see me. im always here for u. and if 1 of them comes ova to tlk to me, ill tell them to fuk off or u can if its matt bode. i know things are hard at the moment and i dont hold u breaking up with me against u. it was for the best probly. giv it some time. ne way, u hav to know i am, coz i dont want u thinkin im never tlkn to u again. i still, and always will, luv u. and i will listen to every problems u r having coz i wanna help u no matter wat the problem is. luv jordan (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, October 30th, 2004
9:11 pm	ok so.... ive tried my best to get ma mind off jessie, and its kinda workin. ive been watchin lots and lots of movies and doin a whole heap of other shit i didnt usually do and its kinda gettn my mind off her. its reli hard! evry day the first thing i think of is her, and then losing her. i wish i was still with her, i want her bak and never to lose her again!!! i want her all to myself, coz i am so selfish! oh well, i am willing to wait a very long time, but by then i dont think jessie will want me any more so its best if i stop, even if i dont want to... Current Mood: nuffin to do, grrrr Current Music: blink 182 ALWAYS (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 28th, 2004
6:29 pm	: ( i dont reli think i want to update this, it would be full of saddnessness..........is that a word??? oh well. this may well be my last post coz the only reason i had this LJ was for jessie............*bursts out cryin* I CANT TAKE IT!!! I CANT HANDLE IT!!! I WANT HER BAK!!! Current Mood: *continues crying* Current Music: maroon 5 - woman (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 27th, 2004
9:14 pm	NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS CANT BE HAPPENING!!!! ITS A DREAM! ALL A DREAM!!!! IT HAS TO BE!!!!.............OH HU AM I KIDDING! THE GIRL OF MY DREAMS IS GONE!!!! THIS CANT BE HAPPENING!!!!!! I THINK ILL JUST CRAWL IN SOME HOLE AND DIE! *CRIES OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AND OVA AGAIN!!!* I HAV TO DO SUMFIN, I CANT EXCEPT THIS! I WILL DO ANY THING TO HAV HER BAK! ANY THING!!! I DONT WANT NE 1 ELSE, I JUST WANT JESSIE!!!! Current Mood: im never gonna give up, NEVER! Current Music: no, to miserable to put ne on (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 26th, 2004
5:51 pm	a list of just a few reasons y i luv u A) u r the most perfect girl i have ever met B) u hav the best personality out of evry one i know C) u hav the best smile i hav ever seen D) u r soooo cute wen u get angry at claire E) u hav the sexiest body F) we both wanna kill nik G) ur beautiful H) u r funny wen start getting "play angry" at claire to me, u r soooo perfect. i never want to be with any 1 else, and i never want to leave u. i care about u more than any one in the world. those r just a few of the reasons of y i am soooo incredibly in luv with u. i never knew y u lykd me. wen i found out i was just lyk "wtf, y would she lyk me. she can do alot better". i didnt know y i should hav even bothered lyking u becoz u are too good for me. and now that i am with u i c that u reli should be with sum1 else. but im gonna hav to be selfish coz i want u all to myself! i luv u soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much! Current Mood: fukn maths assign Current Music: no music atm (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, October 24th, 2004
1:17 pm	la la la.......how fukn hot is it?!? it was so fukn hot yesterday, and its hot today as well!!! i had to play fukn cricket and we had lyk 4 drinks breaks in sted of 1!!! do hav ne fukn idea wat its lyk to hav to bowl 8 overs in about 40 fukn degrees out in the sun??? i was gonna pass out! i was tryna fukn spit but my mouth was so dry i may as well hav been fukn droolin all ova maself!!! oh well, gotta think about the positives. im goin back to skewl tomorrow! and im gonna c jessie! yay!!! i wouldnt usually lyk skewl but now that im goin out with her its got a hell of a lot mor better! shes just so perfect and so pretty and..............well i could go on for the rest of my life about her but this LJ doesnt hav a page big enuf for everything i can think of *sighs*. ne way im gonna go now. l8rz Current Mood: wat next? Current Music: no music, just the hum of a cop car in vice city (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, October 22nd, 2004
10:04 pm	Paranoid mofo comin thru i gotta drop this paranoia shit!!! its killn me :( but yeah, there isnt ne thing i can do bout it! i neva want to leave jessie. she is just so perfect! i never want to leave her! thats y i hav this paranoia! just about ne thing will get me workd up at the moment, but there isnt much i can do. im just gonna go and hang with her evry mornin and show her that i love her as much as i can. Current Mood: i need some more sleep Current Music: good music, but kinda sad (1 Comment |Comment on this)